Dial 1-900-Satonaka
by Nagone
Summary: Chie and Yukiko decide it's time to have an adventure. (AU Fic)


**Dial 1-900-Satonaka**

A Chie Satonaka and Yukiko Amagi AU Fanfic

By Nagone

* * *

**Summary:** Chie and Yukiko decide it's time to have an adventure.

**Genre:** Adventure, Romance

**Rated:** M

**Warnings:** Anatomically lesbian sex, cursing, death, light gore/gross factor 

Prompt taken from **Dreamwidth's Yuri Challenge List** in which Chie and Yukiko replace Lady Gaga and Beyonce from the music video "Telephone".

**Author's Note:** I thought this was a really fascinating challenge, and immediately set to work on it as soon as I found it. I tried to capture the essence of Gaga and Beyonce in the video and make it applicable to Yukiko and Chie. I hope you enjoy.

* * *

_Clang!_

Chie snorted as she walked into the prison yard of Toyotomi Prison. The metal door, a foreboding shield of thick, rusting iron, slammed shut behind her, effectively locking her out in the midday sun. Women milled about: one with hair wrapped around silver soda cans, another with chains wrapped stylishly about her chunky body, another with sunglasses so dark they seemed blue. Some sat in groups, detailing dark black tattoos onto one another's skin and some sat alone, rocking back and forth. A few old-school styled _sekuban_ sat around a the remnants of what looked like a rustic fire, their ripped, long pleated skirts billowing around them in an almost majestic way. They looked very much to Chie like real life apocalyptic schoolgirl princess.

Chie chose to remain alone, regardless.

She sauntered about slowly, thick legs carrying her across the expanse of broken asphalt, glass, and dried grasses. "You're not gonna make it!" a woman called. Chie shrugged, rolling her eyes as she sat down on top of a broken, cracked picnic table. A woman came up behind her and wrapped her arms about her midsection. Chie let her kiss her, despite the ash and nicotine flavoring the foreign woman's tongue.

Chie had just began to relax into the coaxing touches when a loud buzz shot through the area. _"Call for Satonaka! Call for Satonaka!"_ Chie jerked up, pushing the woman away. She frowned and moved from the table, flicking Chie off.

Chie quickly made her way to the shaded pavilion that housed the pay phones. She walked to the one at the farthest end, punched in a few numbers, and waited.

_Biri biri! Biri biri!_

"Hey there, baby" Chie said, sighing. She felt older in that very moment, as if the jail was already taking its toll on her.

"Hey there, honeybee," a voice said on the other side of the line. It crackled. A woman yelled at Chie to hurry up.

"Sorry, I can't hear well. I'm… busy."

"Busy?" the woman asked. She almost sounded sad.

"Yeah, busy." Chie shifted, a woman barreling past her. She scoffed and shifted quickly, fighting the urge to turn violent. "Hey, I'm gonna go. You know the plan." Chie could hear the other woman's smile through the line as it crackled and cut out, fading to the soft klaxon of the dial tone. "See you tomorrow,"

True to her word, when Chie woke up, there was a visitor for her, in the form of an aged warden at her door. She shifted from her uncomfortable bed, the metal frame under the thin mattress digging into her back. "Get dress, inmate."

"Why?" Chie asked, blinking the last remnants of sleep away.

"It's your lucky day, Satonaka. Some bitch bailed you out." Chie smiled in the darkness of the cell. "So get the fuck dressed."

So Chie did.

After an all too cold shower alone Chie found herself dressed in a sleek, close cut green shirt the color of emeralds. She paired it with a pair of dark green pants and a set of freshly shined heel black boots, all gifts from her savior.

"Come on, Satonaka. Let's go."

Chie nodded, finishing the last touches on her make-up. She chose something sharp and deadly, yet still sweet: soft pink lipstick and rogue hat made her seem girly and wing tipped eyeliner that was as sharp as a knife. "Yes ma'am," she said, following behind the warden. She gave a mock salute, heels clicking on the cement floor.

A female officer winked at Chie as she exited the jail. The door slammed behind her, and she sighed as her wrists were released from her the biting metal of the handcuffs. She shook her hands and smiled tightly, rolling her neck. "You're free to go, Satonaka. See you again," the officer said, waving her forward.

"On your life," Chie muttered, stepping forward and out of the exit chamber.

"You'll be back honey."

Outside, the sky was clear and blue. Chie sucked in a deep breath, chest filling with untainted air. A horn sounded before her and she smirked. Before her sat a garish car. In a former life, it must have been conservative, because now, it was a bright yellow. Splashes of white, green, red and pink decorated it in swirls and glossy shapes, all culminating to the name emblazoned on the back: _Kondo-san_. Chie rolled her eyes and snickered, climbing into the passenger side. "Hey, Yukiko."

"You've been a bad girl, Chie. A very, very bad girl," Yukiko said. She held a steaming meat bun in a daintily gloved hand. Slowly, she bit into it, the scent of steak and savory sauce scenting the interior. Chie must have licked her lips because next thing she knew, Yukiko was tapping the treat on her lips. "Eat."

Chie took a long bite, savoring the taste of the meat. "Mmm, mmm, honeybee," she said, swallowing. "Let's go." She reached down and slid on a pair of black gloves Yukiko had placed on her lap.

The sun reflected off the Tottori Sand Dunes, bright and bitter. Yukiko smiled, rolling down the window, red scarf billowing in the wind as she accelerated down the road. "So, where's our next hit?" she asked, voice soft and demure.

"A dinner. I heard that it needs some shaking up. Plus…" Chie's voice trailed off and she adjusted her sunglasses, pushing them up her nose.

"Are you sure, Chie? I mean, we could just go… somewhere." Yukiko's voice was apprehensive.

"Yeah, I am. You know what they say? You've got to get your hands dirty to get what you want."

Yukiko smiled and rolled her shoulders. _Biri biri. Biri biri. _Yukiko frowned. "Don't bother. It's _him _again." The screen lit up with the name of a male. Chie didn't even look to check who it was.

Chie nodded and with a quick hand, snatched up the phone, opened the back and retrieved the data card, and threw it out the window. Pieces of plastic flew up and across the sand, the phone shattering on the pavement. Yukiko laughed loudly, and set her eyes back on the road. "Let's go."

Nearly an hour later, Yukiko pulled up to a small dinner. It was a true gem hidden in the desert. It didn't even have a name: just dinner.

Yukiko was the first to exit. They had already stopped a bit before, enough to afford a quick outfit change. Now Yukiko wore a shirt, dark red dress, pairing it with a black leather belt, black, sheer stockings, a black collar necklace and stiletto hills. Daring black lipstick decorate her thin, ladylike lips. She was dressed to kill in the most literal sense. Chie followed, wearing zipper dress with a black top and green skirt and a slick, double breasted green jacket. Like Yukiko, she work stiletto's, although she'd have preferred her boots.

A bell chimed as the twosome entered the restaurant. A mixture of salarymen, housewives, and travelers sat in the booths and at the tables. The air was stagnant and oily: Chie fought hard not to rub her eyes, keeping in mind Yukiko's meticulous make-up. "See you on the other side," Chie whispered before disappearing down a hallway.

Yukiko nodded and walked over to a booth, sitting down in front of a man. He had hair the color of pewter and a bored air about him. "Um… hey, Yu," she whispered, smiling sweetly.

He crossed his arms and snorted. "Where have you been?"

Yukiko looked down in her lap. "I-"

"Never mind, bitch." Yukiko shifted her chest forward, exposing the dip between her breasts. Yu got up and walked across the room, shoving the bathroom door open.

Quickly, Yukiko slid two fingers into the valley between her breasts. A slender tube of green liquid came out, pinched between her index and thumb. She unscrewed the top and poured it onto the spread before her: a drop in the miso soup, and the rest in her soda. She quickly hid the tube back in her dress and relaxed, waiting patiently for Yu.

With in minutes, he was back, face relaxed as he took a long sip of soda. He coughed hard, fist pounding his chest and slumped back.

In the kitchens, Chie had slipped in, exchanging her outfit for the uniform of the staff: an ugly pink colored dress with white accents and a white apron. Already, she had delivered multiple orders. It was easy: no one noticed anyone at dives like this. "Up for Table Ten!" a burly chef called. She nodded and smiled, taking the plates and walking around the corner. Quickly, she let a bottle fall from her wrist, a familiar green liquid inside. She dumped the contents on the food, exhaling softly. With her foot, she pushed the door open.

"Food sir," she said, setting the plate of steak and potatoes before Yu. He grunted and, with gusto, bit into the food, devouring it without offering any to Yukiko. She nodded and watched mutely as Chie returned to the kitchen.

By now, the staff had grown sluggish. After all, that was what happened when they nibbled at poisoned food. A chef lay prostate on the ground, and a waitress sat near him, covering in her own bile. She kicked them aside and quickly delivered the remaining plates of food, throwing in some free deserts to those already eating.

"Anything else, sir?" she said as she passed by Yukiko's table.

"No thank you ma'am," Yukiko said, smiling a bit more. Chie nodded and made her way back to the kitchen, this time for some untainted treats.

Within minutes, the dinner was filled with coughing, hacking, and spitting. People shook wildly, body parts spasming and shaking until, like flies in the cold, they fell, some in their food, some to the floor, some in their own bile. Chie chuckled and exited the kitchen, a piece of fried chicken pinched between her thick fingers. She had changed back into her original outfit, ditching the outdated duds of the now defunct dinner. "Good job, Yuki," she said, taking another bite of chicken.

Yukiko smiled, running a hand through Yu's hair. "Thank you. I… I owe you so much."

Chie nodded. "You can pay me back with your mouth tonight, Yuki. For now, we gotta go." Chie extended a hand and motioned Yukiko forward.

Yukiko nodded, taking Chie's hand. She clenched it hard and together, the two dashed from the dinner, heels clacking loudly as they skipped over the cooling bodies.

Yukiko wasted no time in speeding down the road. She pushed _Kondo-san _hard as they barreled down the road. Chie laughed, finishing off a piece of pie she'd swiped from the freezer. It was mildly disgusting and she was sure the cream was some fake by-product, but food was food, and she was grateful for it.

They didn't rest until they reached a hotel, hundreds of miles up the road in a remote town. It was pay by the hour and smelled like a love hotel, which was perfect for them. Yukiko paid for the entire night, a flat rate of three thousand yen, with money she'd taken from a man's wallet at the dinner.

Sitting down, they turned on the television, curious. A news theme played, filling the room with the chime of breaking news. _"Good evening. We bring you breaking news. This afternoon, a mass homicide occurred in a dinner along…" _Static filled the air. Chie kicked the television and it cleared. _"…two unidentified women were seen on camera during what appears to be a mass homicide. They are believed to be the culprits and were seen fleeing the scene. There is a reward of…"_ The television faded into static once more. Chie didn't even bother with th

"We did it, Yukiko," Chie said, slowly undoing the zipper on her dress. Yukiko watched with hungry eyes. The dress slid down Chie's body, and Yukiko lunged forward, hands dancing across Chie's skin.

"Yeah, we did," Yukiko said, between kisses. She shifted back and giggled, lipstick smeared across her lips and growled and pushed her back, behding her body to the bed and pinning her down. Yukiko let out a soft moan as Chie's teeth bore down on her neck, marring the pale skin.

"After this, let's go far, far away from here," Chie said, dimming the lights. Soft music began to play in the air, and the lights turned red and pink.

"Promise we'll never come back?" Yukiko whispered, voice gentle and soft. _That's my girl_, Chie thought, pressing her chest against Yukiko's the feeling of their body's back together sweet and welcomed.

"I promise," Chie whispered, voice warm and husky.

Slowly, Yukiko's slender fingers found their way to Chie's and their hands clenched together hand, secure. Chie let her free hand slide down between Yukiko's legs, feeling the warm, sticky moisture of her arousal. It was clear what Yukiko's body desired.

"Now, however, let me enjoy you," Chie said. Yukiko's shuddered in response, and let Chie claim her.


End file.
